Pink! The New Evil!

 

Should parents worry about pink? Look at my daughter Ava. Cute? She may seem so, harmlessly sipping a cola...but don't be fooled. She's actually guzzling my wife's rum and coke. Consider the color of her shirt. Is there a correlation?

What could be cuter than a baby playing in the sand? Yet the adorable just disappears with that spine chilling pink outfit. Yes, my little Kaya looks playful, but she's smiling because she just killed a seagull, ate its entrails, and then buried it in the sand. Is pink involved?

IS THE COLOR PINK EVIL? What is it with girls and pink? According to the BBC, pink is the cause of ‘Princess Disease’: BBC Reports That Pink Princess Thing Does Not Change Girls’ DNA. My daughters love pink, they are doomed.

MY WIFE GOES TO A BASKETBALL GAME: My wife, while on a business trip, went to an NBA game in Denver. She called me from the Pepsi Center, yeah, that’s where they play…and I asked her if she even knew any of the players. She responded, “I’m pretty sure one of the guys is named ‘Nugget’.”

Yeah, but she's still wearing pink.

WHO’S CUTE? Now that the girls go to pre-school I frequent bookstores and cafés,  or I shop (for food, not at the mall; there is nothing more evil than mall shopping…except maybe the color pink) with ten-month-old Kaya. Often I hear someone exclaim, “Oh, how cute!” And I always say, “Why thank you. Check out my baby. She’s pretty cute, too.”

CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE: The only time my wife has thought of killing herself was in the early days of our dating. We traveled some (Hong Kong, Taiwan, Thailand, Laos, Mexico). After a few nights in cockroach hostels I tried to talk my wife into one more, and she almost had tears in her eyes. We found a nicer place.

Gia, still suffering the effects of Disneyland in her Snow White costume, but at least it's not pink.

The only time I’ve ever contemplated suicide is after two straight days at Disneyland.

CHUCK TESSAROooooooo…is cooking! Over on Facebook…Bay infused butternut squash lasagna in oven for Thursday night dinner. Simple frisee & watercress salad w/blue cheez, champ vinaigrette.

THE NEW FREUDIAN SLIP: My wife has given new meaning to the Freudian slip. In our house a Freudian slip is whenever she accidentally pushes, punches, or kicks me in the balls. Example: the other night she reached over my side of the bed to grab the remote and I woke to her using my crotch as a fulcrum. “Ooooof!” I shouted. “Sorry,” she said, “I slipped.” Yeah, slipped my ass.

And for something different – The Tiger’s Nest – Paro Taktsang Monastery, Bhutan
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13 Comments

Filed under Chuck, Disney, Pink, Pink is Evil

13 responses to “Pink! The New Evil!

  1. clark

    Klub – Nice commentary on pink, and I loved the part about someone named “nugget” 🙂 Did you take the picture of The tiger’s nest monastery?

  2. Winnie

    Pink is cool! Amber’s favorite color used to be pink only, now it changed to pink, yellow, purple.
    Kaya’s sand picture reminds me that Amber with sand all over her face and mouth, it was taken in Hawaii when she’s 2.

    ‘She’s actually guzzling my wife’s rum and coke.’ WOW!!

  3. C

    Okay–I’m a girl, and I actually hate pink. Despise it. Looking back in childhood photos, I see no pink. My mom didn’t go there. I’m of the “nurture” vs. “nature” vote on this one.

  4. Bubba

    You don’t like Disneyland? The only way I can believe this, is if these two things are both true.

    You didn’t go at least once as a kid, and you haven’t realized that you can take the monorail to the Disneyland hotel, hit the bars there (which are very good), then return to Disneyland in a better mood.

    • Hello? Hit the bars? Take a monorail? Hello? Bubba.

      Alright, number one, I did go to Disneyland as a kid. Great time. So?

      Number two, when I went as father Ava was 3, Gia was 2, and my wife was pregnant. To enter for one day was $200. $400 bucks for two days. We could have fed a town in, say…India, for that price. We pay and are pleasantly surprised there is no line. We enter, and discover that we are in Disney village, store after store selling Disney crap. We can’t go in to the real Disneyland for an hour. We have children who are impatient. When we finally go in we have long lines and squirmy kids. First ride we took was Snow White, which terrified the girls…anyway, after one day of hell my wife says, “Wow! That was soooooooo fun! Let’s do it again.” So we did. I don’t think the monorail would have changed anything.

      Bars. Bars. Bars? You can go to a bar anywhere. If I left to go to a bar (which I thought of doing often) my wife would have been pissed (and rightly so).

      • themadjewess

        We can see plenty of RATS, they are not at Disneyland, they are in public office, Disney Novelty is now over.

  5. Tracy Perkins

    Love it! It’s fun.

  6. Tracy Perkins

    Think I accidently unsubscrided?????

  7. Pingback: Diapers and Double Standards | Notes of a Sexist Stay-at-home Father

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