Hawaii All Year: Ever since my wife Terry and I returned from a dream vacation in Hawaii in February we noticed, as a gazillion other parents have, how our relationship magically improved without kids. No arguing and all relaxing. Aaaah, to be in Hawaii all the time. Then we returned home to Edmonds.
Hawaii Caleb: Back in the USA Terry started saying, “Boy, I sure miss Hawaii Caleb. Hawaii Caleb was so easy to get along with, but Edmonds Caleb really is a pain in the ass.”
Thing is, I haven’t changed, whether in Hawaii or Edmonds or anywhere, I like to kick back, read, catch a ballgame, have a beer, and internally vent about existential political and human gloom. I’m Hawaii Caleb 365 days a year.
Hawaii Terry: Terry can enjoy Hawaii Caleb in Hawaii, but this version of Caleb doesn’t work on the domestic front. I can be a little too relaxed on chores and responsibilities. Thus the change. No longer Vacation Wife, she’s Mom/Wage Earner/Super Wife, and Hawaii Terry disappears.
Chelan Terry: However, we do get a date night, or as we did in August in Chelan, vacation close to home, and Terry changes from stressed-out Wage Earning Mom to Vacation Wife. She doesn’t really miss Hawaii Caleb, she just wishes Caleb would not act like he’s on vacation at home.
Two corny jokes: (The first and corniest is mine, the second has been making the rounds but is worth repeating.)
Question: What’s a great name for an IPA? Answer: “F Off And”
As we know, Washington State now has legalized pot and gay marriage, fulfilling the Biblical prophecy of Leviticus 20:13 – “If a man lays with another man, as with a woman, he should be stoned.”
5 responses to “Hawaii Caleb and Hawaii Terry”
Sounds like you might want to consider psychoanalysis; I hear lots of good things about it from men your age.
Psychoanalysis is a bigger waste than Eva Hess-types. But regarding who might benefit from quackanalysis, let’s see…? Perhaps it’s no coincidence those who champion psychoanalysis admire schlock art.
Start saving for your next Hawaii vacation!
Since Terry has two personalities based on work days and vacation days, you might develop a work day personality and all may be solved. What do you think?
I love your sense of humor. And it sounds oh so familiar.