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MOMOFUKU: My wife and I celebrated New Year’s with Chuck, Trudy, and kids. Chuck’s quite the chef. He showed us the cookbook Momofuku (Korean for ‘We don’t eat dog any more’). I love Korea, lived there sixteen months, and am down with the food. Check out Momofuku. It’s chock full of profanity laced recipes. Any cookbook that freely uses the word ‘f**k’ is cool by me. (OK, my subtle use of wimpy asterisks – as if ‘f**k’ could spell ‘fOOk’ – pertains to the fact this blog is for a family audience. See Profanity Policy.)
WHY I DON’T LIKE EATING NEW THINGS: I have eaten silkworm larva, sheep’s blood curd, duck penis, goat-on-a-stick, and various other culinary nasties in my travels. I will try anything (food) once, but on the above Eve Chuck cooked squash pizza. I hate squash, I’ve tried it, okay. And even if I wind up liking something (against my better senses) my wife uses it against me. i.e. “Caleb, remember the time you said you wouldn’t like squash pizza and then you did? How can you know you won’t like artichoke and beet salad if you won’t try it?”
WEDDING RING BOTTLE OPENERS: Are there any other guys out there who open beers with their wedding rings? It’s a great way to tell your wife you love her, although my sweetheart doesn’t see it that way.
CARTWHEELING GOALKEEPER: Funniest sports moment of 2009: Goalie Makes Ass of Self. Second? Milton Bradley throwing the ball into the Wrigley Field bleachers with two outs: Chicago Cubs outfielder is now a Mariner!…
AM I A MISOGYNIST? Not at all. Though when my wife and her sister Tracy start having a ‘BreastFest’ talking about makeup and hair and shopping and all that crap I’ll say something shallow and condescending like, “Wow! Fascinating!” Then they’ll call me a misogynist. So my response is, “That’s mister to you. Mr. Ogynist.” (Ignore my insensitivity, BreastFest is a women’s breast cancer support group.)
OBAMA’S UNFULFILLED CAMPAIGN PROMISE: BCS brokers criticize president-elect’s comments on playoff… Has anyone noticed how Obama reneged on his campaign promise to get the BCS out of college football? There’s no playoff in sight! The only things worse than the BCS are talk show hosts who blab incoherently about the BCS. Example: “Ohio State, based on strength-of-schedule blah blah blah, Big Ten second place finisher blah blah blah…” Supposedly Obama’s wasting his time on frivolous issues such as the economy, health care, and Afghanistan. Go figure. (I boycott bowl season, it’s good to have a reason to watch less TV).
OUR NEIGHBOR MARY KAY LETOURNEAU: Evidently you can now check online where all the registered sex offenders live in your neighborhood. National Sex Offender Registry. We looked at all the scumbags in our neighborhood, and Mary Kay Letourneau popped up, as she lives in the U. District. Call it a double standard, but I’m not as worried about her.